It’s the run of the mill day to day that’s sometimes the hardest to take. You wouldn’t believe just how dull cataloging photographs and auditing ammo expenditure can be. Think that field agents spend their time typing up reports? Think again. No, Agents swan around all suited and booted trying to out suave one another, whilst back at the office a diligent team of administrative agents tries to make sense of their martini soaked inebriated hand written notes. Ian flaming has a lot to answer for I can tell you.
So what do I do? I am what the service calls a ferret, a select group of individuals entrusted to run the errands that field agents deem beneath them, and with which the other tech departments can’t be trusted. Now, that may sound harsh, but techies aren’t like you or I, they don’t live it the real world, no, really they don’t.
Take Neil for instance, Neil is a class 3 photo analyst, who got all super excited about our new facial recognition software. But how do you test a state of the art integrated system designed for anti terrorist surveillance? Why not upload a known image, say your own face, and then see if the software can find you in a crowded environment, an office for example. Why not use our own office? That way you wouldn’t even have to leave the building, not forgetting that it even has its own linked in C.C.T.V. system, bonus!
The first thing we knew about it was when the Special Forces response team tasered him in the foyer. And when Met officers tasered him outside Paddington station, and again as he left New Scotland Yard. I say left, he was at least 50 yard down the street when they swooped; no taser this time, just good old pepper spray and a rugby tackle. I must say it is reassuring to know those Met boys are really on message with all the trouble today. Neil is also now on message and recovering nicely, apparently the limp will hardly be noticeable.